Fall 1982, Issue 1

A dog decides cafeteria food is only fit for student dining

Rosie has trouble getting into the Revelle Cafe.

For you humans, this exercise of waiting for someone to open the door is somewhat equivalent to waiting for some other equally inept but older human to buy beer for you.

Finally inside, l felt like a 16 year old just inside Les Girls. 1 selected a dish and approached the counter - another fault in construction. The damn thing was five feet high! No one could even see me.

At this point some Poli-Sci major cut in front of me. I said, "Hey buddy, what's the idea?" He pretended he couldn't hear me. (Humans always pretend they can't hear dogs).

The next difficulty I encountered was finding a seat to stand on. The place was packed with chattering humans.

I would have elected to eat outside but the thought of dealing with that door again prompted me to wait inside for a seat. I found one.

It was time to start my meal, but something still annoyed me. I realize that it is not customary when reviewing a restaurant to make comments about its patrons, but I found myself stared at. If I could have a nickel for every time I heard" Hey, that's a dog!" I'll be rich.

Well, I can't complain about the food, it was tasty But I suppose humans will be reading this and I have found them to be incredibly picky. For crying out loud, I once ate a hamburger that had rolled around in the dirt. But humans can't have any dirt or scum or hair in their food. No, humans are superior.

I guess humans might be attracted to this place. But there are not proper facilities to accommodate canines. Sure, they make ramps for handicapped, but they can't lower the food counter a few feet for dogs. Humans can be so arrogant.